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The Author I’m Still Becoming

 I used to think becoming an author would feel like crossing a finish line. One day, the book would be done. The cover would be finished. The files would be uploaded. The publish button would be pressed. And then, somehow, I would feel different. More certain. More official. More prepared to stand in front of people and say, “Yes, I’m an author.” But what I am learning is that becoming an author does not happen all at once. It happens in layers. It happens the first time you take your own work seriously. It happens when you keep writing after the excitement wears off. It happens when you revise the scene instead of abandoning the story. It happens when you send the newsletter, post the update, set up the author table, and talk about the book even when your voice shakes a little. And it keeps happening long after the book is published. Saying the Word Out Loud There is something strange about calling yourself an author for the first time. At least there was for me....
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Behind Every Finished Book Is a Private Storm

 A finished book looks simple from the outside. A cover. A title. A buy button. Maybe a smiling author photo. Maybe a social media post that says, “It’s live!” From the outside, it can look like the book simply appeared one day, polished and ready, as if the author walked calmly from idea to publication without tripping over doubt, edits, formatting problems, marketing decisions, or the terrifying little voice that asks, What if no one cares? But behind every finished book is a private world most readers never see. There are messy drafts. There are scenes that do not work. There are sentences you love that still have to be cut. There are hours spent staring at one paragraph because it almost says what you mean, but not quite. There are also the ordinary interruptions of real life. The job. The laundry. The dogs. The appointments. The groceries. The dishes in the sink. The days when your brain is ready to write, but your body is tired. The days when your body fin...
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Location: Gillette, WY, USA
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You’re Not Behind — You’re Becoming

Somewhere along the way, we started believing that growth should look like acceleration. Faster progress. Clear milestones. Visible achievement. A steady upward line that proves we are doing life correctly. By a certain age, we’re supposed to have things figured out. Careers stabilized. Creative paths defined. Bodies cooperating. Emotions neatly managed. Dreams either achieved or responsibly set aside. And when reality doesn’t match that timeline, the conclusion feels obvious. We must be behind. It’s a quiet thought at first. Easy to dismiss. But over time, it can become a steady background hum — shaping how we see our work, our healing, and even ourselves.
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Location: Gillette, WY, USA
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What to Cut — And Why It Hurts

 The hardest part of editing isn’t fixing what’s weak. It’s cutting what you love. Weak writing is easy to remove. It announces itself. It stumbles. It drags. It lacks clarity. But the lines you love? The ones that felt electric when you wrote them? The paragraphs you labored over until they finally clicked? Those are harder. Because cutting them feels personal.
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Location: Gillette, WY, USA
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Drafting vs. Editing: Why They Require Different Minds

 Drafting feels like discovery. Editing feels like responsibility. I didn’t fully understand the difference until I worked through both phases of The Taste of Crimson: Angyel . The shift between them was immediate. When I draft, the page feels open. Curious. Almost forgiving. I’m following threads. Listening for voice. Letting scenes stretch beyond what I originally imagined just to see what happens. Drafting is forward motion. It doesn’t require certainty — only willingness. Editing is different. Editing sits upright in the chair. It asks harder questions. It demands clarity. It doesn’t care how inspired I felt when I wrote the line; it cares whether the line earns its place. Many writers stall because they blur these two minds together. They draft with an editor hovering over their shoulder. Or they keep drafting long after the structure is begging for discipline. The problem isn’t talent. It’s using the wrong mind at the wrong time.
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Location: Gillette, WY, USA
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What Writing The Taste of Crimson: Angyel Taught Me About Wanting

 For a long time, I believed wanting was something you either grew out of—or learned to keep quiet. Not because it vanished, but because life teaches you efficiency. Responsibility. Survival. You learn how to make things work. You learn how to be reasonable. And somewhere along the way, wanting begins to feel indulgent, even dangerous. I didn’t start writing The Taste of Crimson: Angyel because I wanted to explore desire. I started because I wanted to understand what happens when a woman goes still, and what it costs her to stay that way. Wanting Is Not the Same as Lacking One of the first things Angyel taught me is that wanting is often misunderstood. Wanting isn’t desperation. It isn’t neediness. It isn’t proof that something is wrong. In the story, a quiet truth emerges; one that became a guiding line for the entire book: “Wanting is not weakness.” That sentence isn’t a rallying cry. It’s a correction. Wanting is information. It’s the body and the self communicating honestly, l...
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This Is Where the Truth Lives

  Intimate Stories, Wild Healing, Honest Words  I didn’t build this space to be tidy. I built it to be true . This website exists for stories that refuse to behave—the kind of writing that arrives out of order, lands in the body first, and insists on being felt before it can be understood. I write about healing, recovery, desire, and creative truth for people who have lived long enough to know that transformation isn’t linear. That wholeness is not a performance. That honesty, when done well, is an act of care. If that’s you, welcome. You’re exactly where you’re supposed to be.
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